Ever thought of that moment you should have said please, am sorry, thank you, will you or even I love you? I wish I knew is one of those phrases we’ve all heard. We regret the things we did that made us feel stupid, the bad relationships we got into, the opportunities we missed, the times we spent unwisely or even those days we overslept when we should have woken up to an early run. And yet, as alluring as the ‘Living Without Regrets’ philosophy sounds, it’s not always easy.
You fall in love with this woman, you tell her, show her, arouse the mutuality in her, make her need you then guess what? You stop and retract. You think you’re going a bit fast and need to slow down. With fear of breaking her heart, you keep mum. So you do your thing, hold her at bay so she know she still got you then wait, perhaps for the right time. She’s not aware what you’re up to, so she doesn’t act weird or ask questions… You still got the game.
Then one day it dawns on you. You realize she means a lot more than a few pick-me-ups. So you bold up, put on your courage face and wear all the confidence you’ve got because it’s time to pull her from the bench and put her in the game. You tell her everything… From how the thought of her makes your feet grow cold to how her touch arouses goosebumps in you, from how she drives you crazy in ways you cannot fathom to how she makes you hunger for something forbidden. But My Oh My! (Jeff Koinange‘s voice) Her reaction is surreal. Totally unexpected. You get heartbroken… You thought she was in. When did she leave? Why? How?
Then she decides to open up.First, she’s shocked, why now? Why wait this long to finally realize she was the one? While you were putting her on hold, she was an active mode on someone else’s world. She gave up on you, not once, not twice not even ten times! On several occasions she’d lost count. If you wanted her after a certain course, why not tell her instead of imagining she’d figure it out?
Much to your chagrin, she confesses how you flooded her thoughts every second of everyday and she didn’t know how to swim. She thought she was too young for you, too incompatible, too imperfect maybe. For fear of how you might have reacted she could not pop. Instead, she died in silence… Piece by piece until there was nothing alive left in her. All she could do was to cyber stalk you praying, hoping that somehow, someway your captions and comments had some sort of hidden answers for her. Sometimes she wondered if there was something wrong with her. Perhaps she’d spent too long in the company of her literary romantic heroes, and consequently her ideas and expectations were far too high. But no! It was you , you were the problem! You’re the one who never made your intentions for her clear enough. An open book but closed chapters! What was she supposed to do?
Imagine how different things would have turned out had you just opened up to her. It was early then, but guess what?Now is too late!
The thing is, it reaches a point you realize you’re in too deep, running so fast in the wrong direction. And the world as we know, is so fragile we cannot afford to wait for what we want. So be it love, family, career, education, exercise or whatever it is you want to step up in, it’s actually really simple…you just have answer the call and stop hitting snooze on your call for greatness.
It’s always a pleasure having you,